 | BEFORE YOU LOVE:Commit |
As your relationship grows you will likely have some surprises. We all put our best foot forward when we begin to date, but as we grow comfortable, we are less defensive and apt to be more of our true selves. Honest, trustworthy people, who are ready for a committed relationship, understand that they have nothing to hide. When asking questions of your date, pay careful attention to their body language and how they respond. Giving defensive and evasive answers, sitting cross armed and failing to make eye contact are all signs that someone isn’t being 100% truthful. If you notice this behavior during discussions, take note and proceed with caution.  |
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I HAVE BEEN DATING A MAN FOR 2 1/2 YEARS NOW. IT IT OKAY TO ASK HIM IF HE PLANS ON MARRYING ME? I BELIEVE HE WILL BUT WHEN?
I believe that in order to have a good relationship, communication is key, so I would say yes. I would discuss the option of marriage, but not just will he propose to you, but how will you handle things financially, how will you handle the rough times etc.
Of course it is! Quisha, you’re about 2 years late with this question! After 2 1/2 years of dating, you should feel comfortable enough to discuss ANYTHING with him, especially if it concerns your future. I have always preferred for a man to take the lead on this topic, but if you feel that he is avoiding or not addressing the issue of marriage, it’s definitely okay to share your desires. Don’t feel that if you mention it, you’re pressuring him or scaring him. It’s your right to know what future plans he may or may not have in place that could affect YOUR life. I would suggest talking with him face-to-face in a serious mode–not during a disagreement or after an intimate moment. Just simply break the ice with, “Do you see me as a part of your future?” OR “Where would you like to see this relationship go?” OR “We’ve been seriously dating for 2 1/2 years. What is our next step? Are we headed towards marriage?” Keep me posted, Quisha.
To answer Quisha’s question, ask your intended where does he see your relationship going, after two and a half years, he should know what he wants. If the answer is just to continue to date with no real commitment, you need to know why, and if his desire is to marry you, then he should have a vision for your relationship and how to prepare for the day you two merge in holy matrimony. Once you have the information you need, then you can decide whether to continue in the relationship or not. I pray to receive the answers you need to make the right decision. Peace & Blessings.
To answer Quisha’s question, ask your intended where does he see your relationship going, after two and a half years, he should know what he wants. If the answer is just to continue to date with no real commitment, you need to know why, and if his desire is to marry you, then he should have a vision for your relationship and how to prepare for the day you two merge in holy matrimony. Once you have the information you need, then you can decide whether to continue in the relationship or not. I pray you receive the answers you need to make the right decision. Peace & Blessings.
IVE BEEN DATING THIS GUY FOR A MINUTE. HE IS VERY NICE TO ME AND MY CHILDREN. IM READY TO COMMIT.I ASKED HIM IF HE SEE US GOING SOMEWHERE IN THE RELATIONSHIP. HE SAID YES. BUT IM WONDERING WHEN? I DONT WANNA WASTE MY TIME OR HIS. SHOULD I BE PATIENT AND WAIT OR JUST BE BLUNT AND ASK WHAT IS HE GOING TO DO.
Ms. Johnson!
My advice is probably the same advice I need, which is the only reason why I chose to respond. First, you two should have an understanding of what you both want individually and then see if that’s what you want together. The other thing is, sometimes God places us in holding patterns for many different reasons. I am concerned that my boyfriend isn’t employed the way I feel he should be employed, but I know that he has just as much of a relationship with God as I do and that God will take care of him as He does me. So, even though we both feel that we want to be married to each other, my big question is when??? We took sex out of our relationship, so that we can really get to know each other and since we are not engaged, when I start fretting over things I will or won’t deal w/ in a marriage, I think about where I am in my life and am I really ready to be married. I’m looking at my finances and as a divorced single mom who has other career goals beyond my current employment situation, I feel those are better things for me to be focused on and not him and his employment. If I’m not happy with my current life situation, including managing my debt so that I can purchase a home, who am I to criticize how he is living his life financially? My point is, God is probably trying to groom you and prepare you to be a wife, which means there are things you need to work on. As humans, we tend to be so impatient, but the worse thing you can do is rush into a marriage b/c a thousand times over it will seem as if it is falling apart, but you have got to have your armour on! That’s when God carries you through like a champ. God may just be giving you time to realize that he may not be the one. Who knows. Just stay prayed up, do what God requires you to do and the relationship will reveal itself to you. Good luck and God’s Love!
I’ve been dating someone for 2 months. We are in a committed relationship..my first since my marriage ended a little over a year ago. As far as character goes, he tends to be a man of his word, a good father and a protector. From the first date, he stated that he is looking for a wife and we have conversations about this all the time, including making future plans for us. He has also stated that, although, we are still getting to know each other, he could see himself enjoying me for the rest of his life. Great! Problem is he plays ball overseas, supposedly, but he’s over 30. I don’t see any positive income at this time and I know that I would have a hard time being married to a man w/o income, especially one who feels that the wife should cook, clean and take care of the children, even if she works. Do you break up with someone like this for this one reason alone?
Cam,
Keep talking to him. You don’t know him yet. Playing ball overseas with no income sounds like more research is NEEDED! You can’t make an investment into someone you met two months ago, and who travels overseas, and be serious. This needs time, prayer, and maybe a trip overseas with him!!
All the best,
Bishop Jakes
I understand your concern and it sounds like panic. It’s ok. Just take a breath and realize that a husband is not defined by his career or his living situation. Things change Day to Day. Take your time and get to know him. It is hard for him to imagine committing to someone that is at home in the states. He is nervous that someone will take you away. So he may say what sounds good. Compile a list of characteristics that would be ideal for you and pray on it. Its too early to make any sudden moves. Learn to be friends first.
I have been dating this Jehovah Witness for a while now. I was thinking about taking it farther, but is it right for me to be serious with someone from another religion. I am so confuse i don’t know what to do because she will not switch. Need some advice badly.
L Webb,
Members of Jehovah Witness tend to be quite devout. Many times if you are not of that faith it may be a real challenge to connect with one who is. Maybe you should look into what they believe first and then weigh that against your own beliefs (you didn’t say what they were) to see if you can both live with such stark differences.
All the best,
Bishop Jakes
Bishop Jakes I am a nondemonational christian, and she is a Jwitness and most of the teachings are the same. Except the trinty, they do not see Jesus as God.
The first thing that you need to do is do some research on the jehovah’s witnessing religion. You will more than likely find that there are not a lot of differences. Don’t believe everything that you hear about it. I am not a Jehovah’s witness but I have read up on it. Also, would you have a problem dating Catholic person? Catholicism is, in my opinion, very different than Christianity.
I believe that no matter what the religion is there is only one God and one Jesus Christ. If the both of you are serious and not unevenly yoked than you both should pray to God together and ask Him for an answer.
L, Webb
I think you are in for some big trouble marrying a Jehovah Witness if you are nt one. My relatives are Jehovas Witnesses and they dont interpret the Bible like Christians.You might end up taking different directions once you are married.They dont believe that heaven and hell exist, they dont believe in the Holy Spirit. They told me recently that all the people who perform miracles are sent by the devil to deceive the world, yet Jesus prayed that we do even greater works than He did.
Cam, you have only dated this person only two months and already there are red flags waving. You could not be possibly commited to a man who has no way of supporting you and you have no real way of knowing what he does overseas. When things are new, its easy to feel the way you feel, but never make decisions while the dust is high and your feel are in the air(because he has swept you off your feet!). Wait until the dust settles and your feel are on the ground, step back and just pray for direction and discernment from God concerning this man, I’m assuming you are much younger than him, so please do not rush into this relationship, and don’t allow him to pressure you, especially if you have doubts now, don’t ask for more trouble than the LORD has already ordained to us (Job 14:1). I pray you find the answers you need. Peace & Blessings.
If you are serious about your relationship with the lord and your church home, dating someone outside your religion can create more problems than you can ever imagine. If you have special memories of holidays and birthdays, you won’t have that married to a Jehovah Witness. If the relationship moves further where will you worship. If separately, why be together. If you dream of a church wedding you won’t have that either. What about bringing children into this world, what faith will they have. Move with caution.
I have a another opinion regarding dating outside of your religion. Are you both Christians, do you believe that Christ died for your sins? Do you believe that Christ is your lord and savior. You may have more in common than you think. I believe as long as there is a common respect amoung 2 people from different religions, especially Christians, why can’t you co-exist and live in harmony. Jesus loved all not just one type of person or religion. I don’t know much about the Jehovah Witness religion but I don’t look at a Christian religion any different than a Baptist, just a different way of worship. I think if you love each other and you communicate respectfully it can work. You can easily marry someone of the same religion and it not work for other reasons, It is hard enough to find someone now who you are compatible with. I agree with Dee to move with caution, but I feel you should move with caution with anyone, not just because they have a different way of worshipping the same God.
Tomyka,
Catholicism IS a Christian sect. It is actually the VERY FIRST Christian sect. All other Christian sects branched off from the “first church” - which is the Roman Catholic church. Yes, there are differences in the way Catholics worship vs. Baptists, Pentecostals, so-called Non-Denominations, etc. But there are a lot of similarities between Catholicism and Lutheran, Episcopalian, Methodist, etc.
It boils down to charismatic vs. non-charismatic styles of worship. It seems like you’re lumping all non-charismatic religious sects as “non-Christian” - and that’s very offensive. If a church believes in, prays to, and worships Jesus Christ then it’s a Christian church - period.
Charismatic vs non-Charismatic? I do know from several months of personal study with Jehovah’s Witnesses that they are NOT Christian. Those who believe in Christ, as the bible states, believe in His life, death and resurection. We believe in HIS DIETY, that Christ is GOD. The first thing JW’s will change is the truth of Trinity. They do NOT believe in the deity of Christ or the Holy Spirit, and therefore cannot be “charismatic”. I would say, as far as the first question regarding dating or having a serious relationship with a JW, if you are strong in your faith in Christ, don’t. Pray for your friend and encourage her to come out of the deception of the JW religion. If the person is not open to it, than walk on. God has someone for you to which you can be equally yoked and of like mind.
Catholics ARE Christians, venerating and partaking of the Blessed Sacrement of Communion regularly, confession and leading a prayerful life. These are signs of a “good” Christian. I know many Catholics who have a VERY special relationship with Christ and experience God in their daily walk.
I spent last Sat night, October 4 with several hundred in the most awesome praise and worship service at the Franciscan University in Stuebenville, Oh. All young people on fire for Christ! You might try attending a Catholic service in your area before you make judgements.
God Bless,
R
Ruth, That is a very strong and opinionated comment you made as well as offensive. It appears you are very ignorant to the religion itself, you may need to do more research before you make such comments. I have studied with JW’s for many years and they ARE Christians!!!! Regardless of the trinity doctrine, Jehovah’s Witnesses beleive Jesus is the son of God and the Holy spirit is God’s active force. The fact that you say they are Not christians shows that you DO NOT know. This seems to be a blog where everyone is bashing each others form of Christianity! So where is the LOVE that Jesus spoke about??? Everyone that is so busy stating that JW’s are not Christians and Catholics are not Christians really need to look at themselves in the mirror, and reflect on what “Christlike” qualities are YOU displaying, by bashing others.
SSmith:
I meant no offense in my comment. I had studied and read their translation of the scripture. In every passge which refers to THE HOLY SPIRIT, it has been written without a capital or the word “HOLY” before Spirit. To me, that takes the DIETY from the disignation of the Spirit as we have read from every other translation of the Word. The JW church determines and distributes it’s own EXCLUSIVE reading materials including the bible. And all believers, or those studying for baptism in the church, are told that these materials must be read and none other.
In my humble opinion, which I’m entitled to, even as a Christian, and this is said without malice or prejudice, the way of their church is liken to a cult. I pray sincerely for those bound up in the JW religion who are submitting to many doctrines and practices which are not biblical. I am, again, speaking the facts as I understand them, from my own experience and not intending ANY offense to anyone.
Studying and understanding the precepts and traditions of all other religions helps us as Christians to have understanding for those of varied faiths. Which is why I suggested to the poster who stated that Catholics are not Christians to try attending a Catholic service. I attended and studyed DAILY with JWs for many months and made an educated decision not to join.
If this choice suits someone else, that’s their decision. I’m not stating that it is WRONG, just that it is not entirely based upon the current accurate translations of the bible. Who knows, maybe we’re all WRONG in our assumptions that what we believe in and how we practice it are the way to eternal life. I strive to have an open mind and reflect love to people, regardless of their faith. Which is why I regularly attend many different churchs. MY JESUS remains, for ME, the SAME…. regardless of others.
I hope you find your personal relationship which JOY and peace.
Much love,
R
Actually Jehovah witness is different then christianity and that is why they have a different name and are taught different things.
Christianity is Christianity, whether you are Catholic or Jehovah Witness…We have so many problems in the world today to separate us, Jesus says in John 13:34,35 I am giving YOU a new commandment, that YOU love one another; just as I have loved YOU, that YOU also love one another. By this all will know that YOU are my disciples, if YOU have love among yourselves.” I think this is a good scripture to keep in mind as Christians, and know that we can still understand each other and love one another even if we have different ways to worship.
i was with this guy for 7 months and i was really committed to him and i was sure we would be taking the next step to marriage in the next couple of months but he just told me he doesnt feel it for me anymore. i love this guy and it just felt like he was the one, we still talk but we are “friends”. i still really love him but i really dont know what to do.
I have been in a relationship for 5 years with the same guy, we have grown and been through some very tough times (infidelity (he and I in the beginning), financial whoas,death) just to name a few but have stuck it out and are quite happy, he owns his own home and I own mine, though I stay at his home 4 days out of a 7 day work week I have a 6 year old daughter who he takes care of like she is his own, we have spoken about marriage but he has yet to produce a ring, he will say things like “when we get married” or “I want us to have a child in 2 years”, but when I begin to speak on it he gets totally freaked out and changes the subject. I am just wanting to know some opinions as to why he tells me he wants to marry me, acts like he does, but hasnt asked yet and should I begin to set some deadlines on him. Be Blessed!
I really am confused about this and would love to hear some input, please.I have been dating this gentleman for almost a year and he has a wondering eye. I told him it made me uncomfortable and he said I was just being insecure. I can handle him glancing at a beautiful woman, who doesnt? But he seems to take notice of them for a long while and seems to do so often, usually in front of me. He refers to Corinthians and says I shouldn’t be jealous. I think he is being rude. I know I love him and he loves me, am I just being insecure or is he being disrespectful? I really don’t know how else to explain to him that it bothers me when he drools over other women and doesnt look at me that way he does them.
I have only with this man for about two months and already he has cheated on me with his ex-wife. He claims that he regrets it but I don’t know if I can believe him after the lying and cheating so early in the relationship. I don’t think I can build trust with him. Not to mention he doen’t like to answer questions. In his past relationship he has had an abundance of cheating, lying, taken advantage, etc. Please tell me what should I do. Or do I alredy know!
My boyfriend and I have been dating 5 years now and in this five years I thought that I knew him and that we had a future together, until recently he cheated on me with a woman 12yrs his elder. He said he is sorry and it was a mistake and he doesnt wanna loose me and he seems “sincere” is there really a future with someone who will do this to? Is it really possible that he can change out of his own? Can this really work? How do I frogive? But importantly how do I restore my selfesteem and how do I forget?
Just to add to the above, I do still love him very much but find it hard to move on from this, he says he loves me too, where do we go from here?
If he has cheated while dating, then that sets the standard for marriage. Can you live with that standard? And if so, once you forgive him, then can you forgive yourself for resetting the standard? Also, if you have dated for 5 years, with no sign of engagement, but with a huge red flag of infidelity, then how has he displayed his love? Love is a difficult thing to capture and define, but if we look at the biblical definition of love, then can you call it love? Man is called to love the wife as Christ loved the Church, a sacrificial type of love. However, your boyfriend has not shown that he is willing to sacrifice those things are most important in order to provide for your growth and protection spiritually and emotionally. We are commanded to present our body a living sacrifice, and it seems that you are the only one prepared to do so in your relationship. I would advise that you instead find someone that is equally yoked.
When do you know it is time to really commit yourself to someone in terms of marriage? How do you know that person is truly the one for you? Do you create a check off list of pros and cons and not deviate from that list? I believe in prayer and waiting for an answer from God, but how do you know that you are truly hearing from God, and not from your own selfish will?
I wish I had joined in a long time ago,maybe I wouldn’t be in the mess Im in right now.Nevertheless Im glad I did,TDJ keep up the godd work.
Dear Bishop, I love a man whom I have had the pleasure of ministering with for 3 years now! He is about 12 years my junior, but if it doesn’t bother him it won’t bother me. He started this relationship, and it has progress to more than just friends. I really love him but he is a little reluctant to talk to me in person or via telephone! We write each other! I have prayed about this, and believe that I have heard from God. I am somewhat reluctant to let my feelings go and just tell him I love him! I don’t say I am “in love” with him because he seems like he is afraid to go further than just writing! How shall I handle this? Do I just wait and see what God does about it!
I think it is so important to get to know someone, and what they really think about you before you fall too deeply in love with them. Being of the same faith really makes a difference, but that does not me that the person is for you. I’d pray and wait until I hear from God and know that it is Him talking and not my emotions!
I really believe that you can hear from God about anything. He said He’d never leave nor forsake us! He won’t give you a stone for bread! So I know He will give you the right answer for anything that concerns you. Sometimes we just have to wait on the answer, and then trust God on the situation! Even if it hurts He will bind up your brokeness! He love us that much!
I “dated” a man in a simular faith as mine, but not quite the same. I do not believe that we were in the same league, as a matter of fact! I wanted it to work, but it turned out that after we had been talking for more than 5 years he married someone else and did not even tell me! At first I was broken hearted, but later down the line I see that God was really protecting me from what could have been a big mistake!
Hello Bishop Jakes and everyone, I am here today for advice and guidance. I have been married for almost five years. My wife and I have just mutually in hearts said I do recently. For all of our marriage we have have been going in two seperate directions like a tug a war. We just had an eye opening experience which change our relationship. Now with this change steps has to made to move forward. I must admit that feel that i really dont know how to have a relationship after experiencing so many failed ones without success. My question and search for advice is what does a woman want for herself and from her man/husband? I asked m wife but she wants me to figure it out. Where do I start Bishop?
My Dearest Pastor TD Jakes. I just love you. Please I need a Gods wisdom advice from you. I am hoping to marry in 3 months, during talks the lady am hoping to marry told me how she really loved her ex. who actually dumped her and married another lady.My concern is that she still phones him. When I suggested to her to try & disconnect completely and barr contact with him, she tried to explain it away by saying that they are just best of friends that there is no strings attached. I really love her deeply but, I think that if she cannot disconnect from her ex comltely there could be something she does not want to let go. I am very uncomfortable about this, please advice me before I go further.
James
is it okay to marry a woman while i’m still a student in university, or should i wait till i finish in more than five years.
thanks so much
IM 22 YRS OLD AND BEEN DATING MY BOYFRIEND GOING ON 6 YEARS IN MARCH. I LOVE HIM AND VERY MUCH IN LOVE WITH HIM STILL, BUT I STRONLY DISLIKE THE FACT THAT HES AN ATHIEST. HE DONT MIND THE FACT THAT I WANT TO GO TO CHURCH OR EVEN PRAY, BUT WHEN I TELL HIM ANYTHING ABOUT THE LORD OR CHIRSTIANITY HE CAN’T STAND IT.. HE SAYS THEIR PHONEY AND FAKES..ALWAYS SAYING SOMETHING NEGATIVE ABOUT CHRISTIANITY..HE DID GO TO YOUTH NIGHT WITH ME A FEW YEARS BACK IT WAS A REALLY BAD FIRST IMPRESSION THE PEOPLE WERE RUDE AND DID’NT EVEN ACKNOWLEDGED OUR FIRST COMING, SO BASICALLY THATS WHAT HE THINKS CHURCH IS ALL ABOUT..WE REALLY DONT ARGUE, BUT WHEN WE DO ITS ABOUT ME BEING RELIGIOUS..PLEASE GET BACK AT ME..THANK YOU PASTOR TD JAKES.
Hi Joelene, do you really want to share/spend the rest of your life with someone with whom you’ll have intimacy EXCEPT on a spiritual level? Marriage is, if nothing else, a spiritual bond. I think you know what you need to do - pray for the strength, grace and faith to do it. All the best and God bless.
I have been dating a guy for 3 years now. We have not discussed marriage or a committment, but he has introduced me to his family -I’ve met them more than once and spent several days with them on more than one occassion and we get along like a house on fire. I have asked him several times where we stand in our “relationship” but he avoids that discussion. Sex is not a part of our “relationship” - it has never been a strong factor; we both prefer to wait until marriage.
Background - we have both been victims of infidelity in our previous marriages. Thankfully, no children were involved. But I think he has trust issues. It’s been about 9 years since my divorce and I’ve dealt with all my pain, hurt, disillusionment and anger - I think he still carries some of his. He doesn’t trust people - at all; sometimes I wonder if he trusts me. He’s constrantly on the defensive and sees things from a negative as opposed to an open minded possibility perspective - me? I’m the forever optimist!! Seriously, I love him dearly and I think he loves me too, but the uncertainty of where this is going (if anywhere) bothers me alot. This year, I committed to myself to walk away from him if he won’t tell me where we stand. I love him and do not want to be with anyone else, but I feel he’s being unfair to me keeping me in the dark. I’m not afraid of learning that this isn’t a relationship leading where I want it to - I can handle that. I’m afraid of getting hurt; I’ve invested ALOT - emotionally, financially, spiritually and psychologically into this relationship and it would break my heart to walk away. But I am prepared to do that to keep my sanity and I would rather be happy aand at peace on my own, than miserable with someone. Am I being unreasonable? How do I get him to understand that I’m not forcing him to marry me, I just want an answweer - no matter what that answer is? Thanks so much!
I’m a single mother and I started seeing a man that I’ve known for years. Since we’ve been seeing each other it’s like he’s very jealous of my daughter and the relationship that she and I have. He’s always asking for money or “a plate” or something. Even though I try to be kind to him, he is very negative towards me to the point of trying to make me feel sorry for him. Now I am not a push over but sometimes when I am trying to be a good samaratan I often ask myself “why am I still in this relationship with someone who is so ungrateful, jealous, and needy. I refuse to let a man come between my daughter and me. I don’t know exactly how to tell him that he needs to “get to stepping” without hurting his feelings as he has so often hurt mine. HELP!
i have been dating my boyfriend for 4 years now and recently we have been having issues that makes me to feel like in due time he will leave me because of some attributes of mine that he has been tolerating. Is it just a feeling or should i follow it up? i have been asking him and he says we should do our best and leave the rest to God is that enough for me to hang on to?
Just to add, i cannot wait to grab a copy of this book!it is certainly an eye-opener!
I CAN TRULY SAY, PLEASE STAY IN GODS PERFECT WILL, SO YOU CAN SEE WOLF IN SHEEP CLOTHING, I WAS ENGAGED FOR 2.5 YEARS, WE WERE HAPPY AND ENJOYED EACH OTHER, TWO WEEKS BEFORE CHRISTMAS, HE TOLD ME HE WAS STILL INLOVE WITH HIS WIFE, WHICH I THOUGHT WAS OVER AND HIS DIVORCE WAS FINALLY, WHEN HE CAME TO ME HE SAID THAT HE HAD PRAYED FOR ME AND GOD SENT ME TO HIM, I HAD BEING PRAYING FOR A MATE AS WELL, SO I THOUGHT THIS WAS REAL, BECAUSE HE ALWAYS, USED THE WORD, HE WAS VERY NICE, CHARMNING, ONE DAY HE CAME OVER I TOLD HIM IT’S LATE HE MUST LEAVE, HE SAID I AM HOMELESS, I DONT HAVE A PLACE TO GO, I HAD COMPASSION, NOW I KNOW IT WAS ALL A GAME, HE WAS GOING TO GO ON AN OUTING, HE DIDN;T HAVE SHOES, CLOTHES OR NOTHING, I BROUGHT HIM CLOTHES, SHOES, CAR, FOOD, GAVE A WARM PLACE TO SLEEP, HE WENT TO MY PASTOR FOR MY HAND IN MARRIAGE, HE ASKED MY BOSS TO BE HIS BEST MAN, THEM THE TRUTH CAME HIS DIVORCE WASN’T TO BE FINAL UNITL FEB 2009 OUR WEDDING APRIL 2009, HE BROKE MY HEART, IN DEC 2008 I WANT REVENGE, BUT I KNOW I MUST PUT HIM IN THE HANDS OF GOD, BOTTOM LINE HE WENT BACK TO HIS WIFE TO MAKE THINGS WORK, I AM SO HURT, BECAUSE I FEEL USED AND BETRAYAL, AND USED AND ABUSED, I FEEL I LOST FOCUS OF GOD AND THIS IS THE RESULT OF IT
THANKS GOD FOR HEALING
I been dating this man for almost five months he say he loves well say we say we both love eachother theres one problem he stays in another state and i stay in another state do you really think love is there can you love and care for a person so much if yall two are not togther c i have two girls and he has one girl an djust found out that he has twins on the way but this happen before we statrd to talk and everything im willing to do anything to be next to him and his kids he tells me everyday he needs me im his heart and everything and im really feeling him we both r feeling eachother do you think this is stuipd or just false love